Nigerian columnist and writer Betty Irabor has recalled a bitter-sweet moment with her husband, Soni Irabor, as she preached against pride.
In a lengthy post on her Instagram page, the publisher of Genevieve Magazine revealed that there was a day she banged the door on her husband after one of their fights. She said as she stormed out of her bedroom, the Holy Spirit arrested her for disrespecting her husband and told her to go apologise, which she first refused to do.
Betty said that her conviction wouldn’t let her be, and she turned right back to the room, but was chased out by her husband. She said her heart was heavy the entire day, and peace eluded her.
She later went to apologise to him when she saw his mood had improved, and to her surprise, Soni was compassionate to her and didn’t exploit her situation. The powerhouse media personality avowed that knowing when to retreat or surrender in a marital dispute isn’t a sign of weakness – it’s wisdom.
Irabor warned that we must never exploit our spouse’s good nature. She stressed that pride must never speak louder than love, as marriage isn’t about who wins in an argument, but who guards the peace.
“PRIDE MUST NEVER SPEAK LOUDER THAN LOVE
This morning I found myself reflecting on that day I banged the door on my husband after one of those inconsequential tiffs—you know, the kind where we put our mouths in gear 5 and go wielding… and then suddenly you’re like Oops! Did I really say that?!
As I stormed out of our bedroom in blind rage that morning, the Holy Spirit ARRESTED me right there at the door:
Clap for yourself, Betty! You must be very proud of the disrespect you just showed your husband. Now go back and apologise.”
The voice was clear and loud!
I froze. Apologize? Me?
But conviction wouldn’t let me be. I turned right back to the room—only to be chased out. Ah! I didn’t expect that, but I deserved it. My heart was heavy the entire day; peace eluded me.
Later that evening, I heard him chuckling at a movie, and I knew it was time. Humbled and sober, I approached him. My knees may have been weak from aches, but I still went down on them in utmost remorse and said,
“Soni, I’m sorry. Please forgive me.”
Guess what my husband did? Hmmm!!
He reached out to help me up, saying with urgency in his voice;
“Ah, Betty, get up, get up, remember your knees—you’ll hurt them.”
I was moved to tears by the compassion in his voice.
It wasn’t the reaction I expected. I thought he would chase me away again, but he was more concerned about my knees than my offence.
He didn’t exploit the situation!
That broke me. But then that’s my husband for you—kindness and compassion personified.
The truth is, knowing when to retreat or surrender in a marital dispute is not a sign of weakness — it’s wisdom.
It’s the understanding that peace is more valuable than being right.
That sometimes love whispers, “Let it go,” even when pride wants the last word.
We must never exploit our spouse’s good nature.