What Is Squirting? – How To Make A Woman Squirt During Sex

Curious about learning how to squirt during sex? You’ve come to the right place.

“Squirting” remains one of the more highly debated subjects in sexual health science, amid lingering doubts as to whether it is, in fact, a real phenomenon or not. We probably know just as much (if not more) about the composition of the fluids that flowed on the surface of Mars billions of years ago as we do about the nature of squirting during sex. How is that possible, given that references to squirting date back to fourth-century Taoist texts?

We can partially blame the stigma. Anything to do with female sexuality continues to be particularly taboo and understudied. But the result is that we remain so clueless about squirting that some medical professionals continue to insist that any fluid that leaks out of a woman during sex constitutes peeing—a result of incontinence.

Time to set the record straight on squirting during sex.

What is squirting?

Squirting is an expulsion of watery fluid through the urethra—the tube that transports urine from the bladder out of the body. Sex educator Lola Jean, a world record holder for volume squirting, says squirting can (and often does) happen during a time of sexual pleasure “but not always and not for everyone.”

“The common assumption is that squirting is an orgasm and it happens when you hammer away at the G-spot,” Lola Jean says. “But you can squirt from clit stimulation; you can squirt from nipple stimulation. It’s happening within the body. And yes, sometimes if you manually stimulate the G-spot, that can trigger it too.”

Squirting is often confused with lubrication, a slippery substance secreted by the walls of the vagina when you’re aroused. What makes the two types of fluid distinct is where they originate. The wetness associated with lubrication is secreted by the Bartholin’s glands that sit on either side of your vaginal opening.

How do women squirt?

Experts aren’t entirely sure where the fluid comes from, but research indicates that the Skene’s glands (also known as paraurethral glands or the female prostate), uric acid, and urea are involved. This tube of tissue wraps around the urethra. And as arousal builds, the erectile compartments swell up like a bunch of grapes filled with fluid, according to Sheri Winston, author of Women’s Anatomy of Arousal: Secret Maps to Buried Pleasure.

The fluid is filtered out from the watery part of our blood plasma and combines with secretions similar in composition to those of the male prostate. It sounds strange, but it’s just nature at work. In fact, it’s similar to how nursing mothers make breast milk, which also involves fluids filtered from the blood.

Is squirting pee?

Because research is sparse, the composition of squirt fluid is still up for debate. According to a 2022 study published in the International Journal of Urology, urine is the main component of squirting fluid and the bladder is where much of the secretions seem to originate. That said, most of the squirting samples collected for this study also contained prostate-specific antigen (PSA), which originates in the Skene’s glands, or paraurethral glands—not the bladder. In other words, squirting is not composed exclusively of urine. And the presence of PSA makes squirting different from urinating and female ejaculation.

“Does it feel good? Was it fun sexual times? Is liquid coming out? It’s probably squirt,” Lola Jean explains. “I’ve peed a lot of times, and I have squirted a lot of times, and both of them feel good but in very different ways. Whenever people are telling me that I’m just peeing, I’m like, ‘Do you think I’m that much of an idiot?’ I know the difference when I’m peeing versus when I’m squirting. It’s a different physical sensation. It’s a different physical activity within my body.”

Smell is another way to spot the difference between peeing and squirting. “When bodily fluids are fresh, they have a smell to them that’s very unique,” Lola Jean describes. “I find that mine smells kind of wheaty. I always say it smells like cereal milk. It’s this grainy kind of smell that my pee doesn’t necessarily have.”

Am I squirting or ejaculating?

This 2022 review of squirting literature takes the position that female ejaculation and squirting are similar but different phenomena. The two can occur in tandem, but their underlying mechanisms are not the same. Squirting is defined as a transurethral expulsion from the urinary bladder of approximately 10 milliliters or more of transparent fluid, whereas female ejaculation is considered a secretion of a very small amount of thick fluid from the paraurethral glands. Female ejaculate features a high concentration of PSA. Squirting fluid is thought to be mostly urine with trace amounts of PSA.

Still, there are valid reasons a person—particularly someone who is trans, nonbinary, or intersex—might prefer to use the words squirting and ejaculating interchangeably. “A lot of people refer to squirting as female ejaculation, which also makes it super gendered,” Lola Jean says. “The cool thing about squirting is it can be a very gender euphoric thing, especially for transmasc folks.”

Gender euphoria, Lola Jean goes on, is not necessarily the same as sexual pleasure. Instead the term describes a feeling of goodness and wholeness in one’s body. “I’ve coached someone who was like, ‘I squirt and I’m transmasc, but I would like to projectile squirt because I feel like it would affirm things more,’” she says.

Why do you squirt?

When fluids build up in the erectile tissue of the urethral sponge, they need to be released. Some believe that the expulsion of fluid during sex may function to protect the urinary system from infection by cleansing the urethra during and after intercourse.

Can all women squirt?

Per a 2013 study published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine, anywhere from 10% to 54% of women can experience squirting. The volume of fluid can vary widely—ranging from small, barely noticeable amounts to a full-on gush—so there is variability in how women define and report their experience in their sex lives. Some experts believe that all women squirt but most don’t know it, as the fluid may flow backward into the bladder. It’s completely possible that you’ve squirted during sex without realizing it.

Winston, for instance, argues that some women are “natural ejaculators” but that all women are capable of it. In other words, it can be learned. “I think that everyone with a vulva is capable of squirting if they have a good enough understanding of their pelvic floor and relationship with their vulva,” says Lola Jean.

Can a man squirt? Perhaps! Lola Jean says squirting is different but possible for people with penises. “In most cases that I’ve heard of, this is usually in a post-ejaculate state from rubbing on the very tip of the urethra, producing a very similar kind of liquid consistency.”

How to squirt during sex

Juicy sex can be great fun for all involved. If you squirt during sex—or you’re hoping to experience it for the first time—trust the process. It can be something that happens in 5 seconds or 20 minutes, depending on your level of arousal. And it can take anywhere from a single attempt to several years of gradually training your body to learn how to squirt.

Lola Jean self-identifies as a broad-response squirter. For her, squirting is how her body generally responds to pleasure. Specific-response squirters, on the other hand, need a certain kind of stimulus to squirt. For this kind of person, it could take some time to identify what does and does not trigger squirting. Be patient and open to experimentation, but the tips below can provide a good starting point for bodily discovery.

How to make yourself squirt

The first step in learning how to ejaculate involves masturbation. Sex therapist turned neuroscientist Nan Wise, PhD, says her research has shown that strengthening your pleasure pathways by experiencing pleasure regularly can make orgasms more accessible. Lola Jean agrees that figuring out squirting through solo play is best because you don’t have to worry about another person, which can sometimes be what causes sexual hangups and trauma.

1. Hydrate.

Guzzling water won’t necessarily help or hurt your ability squirt. Still, it’s a good idea to hydrate beforehand in the hope of potentially squirting more quickly and easily. “Trust me, I’ve been dehydrated and I have squirted buckets,” Lola Jean says. “There’s not a direct correlation. It’s just going to take me longer with my arousal to build up that squirt fluid as opposed to if I am already hydrated.”

2. Get to know your pelvic floor.

Show your pelvic floor muscles the respect they deserve. The most superficial layer of your pelvic floor is made of small muscles that play a big role in sexual function. These are the muscles you’re contracting when you do Kegel exercises, and having a toned pelvic floor can help you achieve stronger orgasms. When you squeeze these muscles, you’re also engaging nearby errogenous zones.

“When you’re utilizing the pelvic floor, you’re engaging with the G-area and the G-spot and the clitoris,” Lola Jean says. “You could be rubbing your clit while you’re engaging with your pelvic floor like this to make rubbing your clit even better. Or when someone is penetrating, you can engage with this to make it feel better for you.”

That said, for the purpose of squirting, you should also learn how to get these muscles to relax and elongate. “A surefire way to get relaxation is child’s pose,” Lola Jean says. “Or if you take a deep breath in and a deep breath out afterward, your pelvic floor should naturally reset. But most people don’t really know how to do so or whether they’re doing it correctly, so this is where we can use our finger internally to get that realtime feedback or we can cheat it with our breath.”

3. Spend some time with your perineal sponge.

Don’t focus solely on the G-spot. Directly south of that is the perennial sponge: an area with a lot of pleasure capabilities that is also responsible for the majority of lubrication of the vagina. Stimulating and exploring this area is one way to test whether you might be capable of squirting.

“If you hear the splish-splash sound when you’re inside, then you have it within you,” Lola Jean says. “The squirt is there. You just have some figure out how to get it out of your body, especially for people who have been wired to hold it in.”

4. Stimulate your G-spot.

Once you’ve tapped into regular orgasms, the key is prolonged stimulation of the urethral sponge. How does one do that? Build arousal through vigorous and repetitive G-spot stimulation. You can find it by reaching into the vagina (with a sex toy like a vibrator or a finger) while angling up in the direction of your belly. Winston suggests bearing down with your abdominal and pelvic floor muscles as you feel an orgasm approaching.

Doing a come-hither motion with your fingers isn’t the only way (or even the best way) to stimulate your G-spot manually. In class Lola Jean teaches a different approach she’s dubbed the motorcycle rev, where you’re rubbing on the G-spot instead of hammering away at it.

Here’s how to do the motorcycle rev: Insert your middle and ring fingers internally and let them align with the natural curvature of the vagina. Make sure your thumb isn’t poking in an uncomfortable way. Let your index and pinky finger sit just outside your vulva and allow the heel of your hand to rest on your mons, thus creating interaction with the shaft of the clitoris. Whether you rev slowly or quickly is up to you, but either way, you’re moving your fingers but maintaining contact with the G-spot the whole time.

“I really like this move because it has all these different points of contact with the clit,” Lola Jean says. “We have those two inner fingers internally, the index and the pinky finger are getting parts of the vulva externally, but through the vulva, through the outer labia. And the heel of the hand is on the shaft of the clitoris.”

How to make a woman squirt

Lola Jean takes issue with the notion of making someone squirt. Instead, she prefers to think about squirting during partnered sex as an “alleyoop,” where the squirter does most of the work, but their partner knocks it in for the big finish. The most important way someone can assist their partner in squirting is helping to build a lot of arousal, and in turn, a lot of fluid.

1. Connect with your partner.

To squirt during partnered sex, connection is everything. More important than the use of any technique is to enhance the quality of the in-the-moment rapport with your partner. Take a tip from tantric practitioners and sit across from your partner and look deeply into their eyes (a huge challenge for most people at first). Savor the experience of breathing in unison, while tuning into the sensations in your body as you feel the breath move in and out. Breathing techniques that activate your pelvic floor can help build heat.

2. Set the scene.

Light a few candles, arrange some pretty flowers in a vase, scent the air with essential oils—whatever floats your boat; create a space that is alluring. You can also puddle-proof your bed. One of the more common concerns about letting go sufficiently to squirt is the reluctance to get things a bit messy. Standard towels will do in a pinch. But waterproof sex blankets, also known as splash pads or splash blankets, are available from brands like Yoni Pleasure Palace, Squirtopia, Venus Matters, and Liberator. High-volume squirters, however, may find disposable puppy pads more convenient.

“Take ownership of preparing for the mess because it gets me so out of my head when I’m hooking up with someone,” Lola Jean says. “If my partner is able to be like, ‘I’m going to put this pad down, I’m going to take care of this, I’m going to pack this on our vacation….’ I’ve almost cried when that’s happened. Take ownership over the mess; take ownership over cleaning up. Take ownership over preparation, and that will help your person worry less so they can focus on feeling good.”

3. Start with plenty of foreplay.

To squirt with a partner, begin the session with lots of sensation play. Let your partner explore the nooks and crannies of your body. Dr. Nan recommends paying special attention to the vulva and clitoris. By building arousal via clitoral stimulation, you will increase the storage of fluids in the urethral sponge which are expelled during squirting. Having a bit of patience will pay off big time (and if you need advice on how to make sex last longer, we have you covered). Don’t attempt to penetrate the vagina with anything until the arousal level is high.

“Arousal is really key here, and ideally you’re taking your time with it and not speeding it up,” Lola Jean advises. “We tend to think that hard and fast equals better, but a slow build before the roller coaster is a really good way to go about it.”

Lola Jean, on the other hand, says external stimulation is her go-to. “The perineal sponge—that ‘six o’clock south’ portion inside the vagina—is a really awesome place to play with during this arousal period,” she says. “Because there’s a bunch of erectile tissue and nerves, but it’s not directly interacting with the clitoris, which can make things super sensitive.”

The shaft of the clitoris—the area directly above the clit—and the mons pubis are great options for external stimulation too. “If your person likes oral sex, you can apply some suction with your mouth to a large surface area around them and start playing with that lightly,” she says. “I really like to focus on broad surface area. I think more people tend to like broad surface area touch instead of specific touch, meaning four fingers together instead of one finger. Or if your person likes pressure a lot, you can play with the heel of your hand or your wrist nub in and around their vulva.”

Looking for a few toys to help you get the job done? Check out Glamour’s list of the best sex toys for couples.

4. Assume the position.

To find the best sex positions for squirting, lie down on your splash pad and get cozy. Have your partner sit by your side facing you.

Next, have your partner liberally lubricate their index and pointer fingers with lube and insert first one, and then gradually both, slowly and intentionally into the vagina. Ask your partner to rhythmically stroke the length of the vaginal wall starting from the deepest part and applying some upward pressure, toward the belly button, as if making the motion to “come here,” gradually building up both the pressure and the rate of stroking. Or you can ask your partner to try Lola Jean’s alternative to the come-hither move, described above as the motorcycle rev.

Keep the communicating with your partner. The “stroker,” or the partner giving the stimulation, can pay careful attention to the cues from the or pleasure receiver’s body, face, and sounds to get feedback. The receiver can experiment with tightening her vaginal muscles around the fingers of the stroker and bearing down as the sensations build to increase the probability of having an orgasm and/or squirting.

It can be harder to squirt when something or someone is penetrating you. But Lola Jean says doggy can be a particularly useful position to achieve squirting during sex. “If you’re being penetrated, you can really adjust where that’s hitting by cat-cowing your back,” she says. “If something feels too intense, you can move it in a different direction so it’s not hitting that spot anymore.”

Legs overhead or legs resting on your partner’s shoulders is another winning position for squirting because you can change the depth if your partner is able to lift you onto their knees or push your legs back a little bit. You can also incorporate other sex acts to heighten the sensation, such as nipple play and anal sex. For some people, indirect stimulation through the vaginal wall during anal sex feels better than applying pressure directly to the G-spot. Read this for more anal sex tips.

5. Let go.

In Dr. Nan’s experience, once women get past the worry that they will mess up the sheets and accept that ejaculation isn’t the same as urination, they can let go and experience the full pleasure of squirting during sex. But most important, don’t chase the orgasm or the ejaculation. Let the sensations find you. Be present to your experience and your connection with your partner. And when you’re not in the heat of the moment, peep these additional tips on how to orgasm during sex.

Why can’t I squirt?

It’s common for women to discover their ability to squirt later in life. “I’ve had plenty of people who discovered they could do this at age 60,” Lola Jean says. “Just because you can’t do it now doesn’t mean it won’t happen in the future. It could be that you’re just trying one way to make it happen. Maybe you’re not enjoying the ride and you’re too focused on getting to this end goal.”

In Lola Jean’s case, mastering squirting was a process of gradually learning to trust and understand her body. “I always say squirting is overrated,” she says. “Maybe it doesn’t happen for you today. Maybe it happens for you in a year or 10 years, but you are not missing out on the best thing ever. Squirting is so hypersexualized and seen as such a skill. People think that it must be great or something they need to strive to have. But if you can’t, just go easy on yourself—it could happen for you in time. But also, if it doesn’t, that’s fine. You’re not missing out.”

The first-time squirt

Lola Jean considers herself lucky to have had a partner mention squirting to her in an inquisitive, rather than exclamatory, way. “Most people have no idea the first time they squirt unless they either have a lot of physical evidence or someone alerts them to it,” she says. “My partner was like, ‘Oh, you squirted. Is that something you do?’ I’m so thankful that was the approach he took instead of saying, ‘That’s so hot,’ or ‘That’s so gross.’ And making it about himself.”

After that experience, Lola Jean took it upon herself to explore her ability to squirt further. “I locked myself in my room and masturbated until I was able to replicate this sensation,” she says. “From there, it was just continuing to understand it more and more: What could trigger it and what to do with my body when I was forcing it too much. There are lots of different ways to squirt.”

How can I squirt more?

You can try to increase the volume of fluid you release while squirting by spending more time building arousal. “I’m a high-volume bitch,” Lola Jean quips. “I squirt a lot, a lot, a lot. Not all the time, but most of the time. Some people just squirt a little trickle, and that is the capacity of their squirt. That doesn’t mean mine was more pleasurable and theirs wasn’t or vice versa. Everyone just has a different threshold.”

Rather than focus on volume, Lola Jean finds it easier to coach students on how to increase distance or projectile squirt. “It just comes down to physics—you have to increase the force,” Lola Jean says. “You can have something that’s penetrating, like a dildo or penis, and build up before kind of releasing the dam so there’s more force. Or you can have way more intense simulation, and that’s where something like the Hitachi Magic Wand or a clit suction toy can come into play. That will create more force because of the amount of intensity placed on it.”

In selecting a dildo for projectile squirting, Lola Jean suggests choosing a girthier option with little room for the fluid to go around it. Although the Njoy Pure Wand is her favorite toy for squirting in general, it may be too small for those hoping to projectile squirt.

Whether you’re learning how to squirt during partnered or solo play, having the best sex toys for squirting on hand can help. These expert-approved toys can benefit beginners and experienced squirters alike. And if you’re anxious to have your new toys in hand ASAP, you’ll find plenty of options with fast shipping in Glamour’s guide to the best Amazon sex toys.

“My favorite toy for squirting is the Njoy Pure Wand,” Lola Jean says. “It’s really good for building up that arousal fluid, and the weight of it is really nice. The key to using the toy, though, is to use it like a seesaw and not a saw. So it’s stimulating the G-area and the perineal sponge, but it’s doing this with a rounded metal design. It’s a lot easier on these areas than nubby fingers.”

She also recommends clitoral pulsation or suction toys. “I love these because I like to say that your body stands no chance against them,” she says. “They’re not everyone’s cup of tea, but they can teach and show people that your body is capable of squirting without any kind of penetration. If your body did it once, it can do it again. If you squirted with a partner, you’ll squirt with someone else. It is not tied to one person—your body that did that. Not everyone is going to squirt with the clitoral suction ones, but because it’s such an intense sensation, it tends to happen if you let it. Your body will go on autopilot, and that’s when it’s going to do some pretty cool stuff.”